How many times have you tried to speak before an audience and they weren't interested? Do you know why you don't get applause after your office presentation? Well, all of us know why it's because we don't make an attempt to understand the non-verbal signs that people give.
One of the steps to improving the personality is to understand your emotions and those of others. If you understand your emotions then it is very easy to control them. Similarly, by understanding other's emotions, you know what the other person likes, what are his/her interests.
Surprisingly, body language plays an important part in communicating emotions. Hence, it is important to understand body language which is the unspoken words or non-verbal communication. When you can understand these unspoken words, we can use it to our advantage. Combining with verbal communication, we can get a complete picture of what the other person is saying and adjust our approach to suit the situation we are trying to handle. We can also adjust our own body language to appear more positive and confident. Knowing this language can help you crack difficult conversations easily and also get a favorable outcome.
So what are these signs that you should look for?
1. Arms folded or legs crossed - People usually take up this posture when they are likely to be disengaged, disinterested, or unhappy with your presence in their personal space or conversation.
2. The body turned away from you or Feet not pointing to you - Research suggests that our feet point to the direction where the person we are interested in is currently sitting or standing. So, if people are not interested their feet may be pointing in some other direction.
3. A minimal or tense facial expression or avoiding eye contact. People tend to adopt this posture when they are not interested in what you are trying to express and they want you to move away from their personal space.
Territory or personal space
Territory or the personal space is the virtual space around a person which he or she considers as his\her own space. Just like the walls, there is an invisible space around a person which one believes belongs to them and no one else.
When someone else enters this space and the person does not like it, he or she feels threatened, intimidated, and uncomfortable. Just like how we feel when some stranger enters our home without our permission.
If the person is comfortable with you being in their space that me that person has accepted you and does not feel threatened and is interested and likes your company. Just like how we are comfortable with our family members and close friends.
Not only humans but even animals and birds have their territory and they actually have the sense of others' territory. You must have seen some animals like a cat that walks towards you but changes its path as soon as it reaches closer to you so as not to enter your space.
Never enter anybody's personal space if they don't like it. You are just creating a hostile situation. Rather try to make them feel comfortable and that you are not a threat by using positive body language. Like for example leaning forward or backward. Leaning forward decreases the personal space while leaning backward increases it. It implies that either we are trying to enter someone's personal space or inviting them to be in our personal space. However, this has to be in a natural way and not forcing yourself. The person would gradually accept you within their personal space.
How understanding body language can help in improving your personality?
Practicing powerful and positive body language is the best way to improve your self-confidence which can in turn boost your self-confidence. When you practice powerful and positive body language, you are sending a message to your brain to reinforce positive and confident feelings and fake it till you make it a regular approach. This can actually generate real confidence.
Here are some ways to boost your self-confidence using your body language.
Emmy Cuddy, an American psychologist, says standing or sitting with certain poses for a little than two minutes raises testosterone level which is a dominant hormone and lowers cortisol, which is the stress hormone. She further explained being open during victory is human nature. After winning a race Usain Bolt shows his victory pose that represents pride. Study shows that even blind people who never saw someone doing a victory pose does that is same arms up and the chin slightly lifted. By looking at this such person, you can immediately identify whether the person has high power and low power. When we notice someone being more powerful to us, we tend to treat ourselves as being smaller.
Now don't be mistaken. This poses works like preparation. So don't do it during an event do this for two minutes before the actual event.
Smiling is very powerful. It makes others realize you have a positive outlook and that you are relaxed and content. Smile and let it show in your eyes. You will see it not only makes a big difference in how people react to you. But it also eventually makes you feel much more confident.
Always during a conversation make eye contact and keep it. Proper eye contact will transmit confidence and interest. Make eye contact and blink normally and nod your head firmly
To improve your personality it is important to build your self-confidence. And always remember that mistakes are inevitable. Nobody's perfect in this part. We all make mistakes. So don't try to be perfect. Try to be yourself.